I cannot sleeep.
I kept tossing & turning so i decided to wake up.

Right below is what happened to me the last week.
If you don't want to know,
please don't read.

If you want to know,
please dont come and ask me nonsense.

Unless you're the guy or the girl or the friend mentioned there.
If you're the guy, i just had to blog everything out. sorry.
If you're the girl, aiya, you'll know if you are the girl or not.
If you're the friend. YOU DEFINATELY KNOW.


I dreamt 2 dreams tonight.
& its amazing that i can remember not just one,
but two.

The first dream...
I dreamt about derrick asking me.
"Who will win?"
He kept asking me that whenever we met at lectures
for the last 3 weeks.
Then i always wanted to know what was he trying to ask me,
so i asked him what was he trying to say.
So anyway he told me...
"No la, we were just wondering who will win your heart eventually,
you always with some different girls what."

When he told me that,
i laughed and laughed and laughed.

So last night,
i dreamt about that first.

I dreamt that i had to choose between 2 people.
One that loves me but i dont love her.
& one that doesn't love me, but i love her.

Then i woke up after i made my choice.

My second dream was about a person.
I dont know if she wants me to put her name here,
but i think i shalln't first.

I dream that we went out.
We were holding hands and about to cross the road when,
BHAM.

Isaac got hit by some monsteric vechicle.
& then, she just walked away.

Then i woke up.

I messaged her to tell her about my dream at about 5am.


Notice the picture up there?
Nice isn't it ?
But if you look closely enough, the heart's made up of many pieces,
but.... there's still a crack line in the middle of the heart.
It speaks so much truth doesn't it ?

Like... no matter how a heart is healed,
there would always be scars left; eternally.

About a month ago,
i fell in love with someone.

Somone i told myself, i would never fall for.

My friends told me last time that...
"You'll end up liking her one la"
But i chided them and told them, what nonsense la!

They were right; I was wrong.

2 nights ago,
i told myself, i cannot possibly like the person anymore.

My friends were divided over my choice.
Some of them told me... "yea man, she's not worth your time."
While others told me... "just tell her you like her."

I gave myself 4 hours to forget her.
from 12 am to 4 am.

As much as i tried to stop liking her,
i talked to her throughout the 4 hours
and it just wasn't possible to not like her.

I don't usually fall for people.
I really don't.
When i do, its because they're really special.

Or if they have nice eyes!
(cause all my 3 ex girlfriends can proudly say that they have nice eyes!)
HAhaa.

Besides liking her,
it was more complicated.

Cause i knew of someone who liked her too.
Or perhaps his actions just show it.
I trust my gut feelings, a lot.

so liking her, suddenly became very hard for me.

I was trying to balance my friendship with her,
my friendship with him,
and my love for her.

I asked him once,
do you like her.

No, i asked him 12 times.

He told me no.

My friend told me to trust him.
& i told her in return, that i trust her.

But my gut feelings are never wrong.

Im quite sure he likes her.

So i told him to take care of her when i stopped liking her,
cause thats the least i can do for her right?
so i gave myself 4 hours.

When 4 hours was up,
i just couldn't stop liking her.

But i told myself,
go sleeeeeep.
Maybe when i woke up, i'll think differently.

But when i woke up,
the first person i thought of was her.

Everytime i meet her,
i dont know why i fell for her.

But whenever our eyes meet,
i cannot help staring deep inside and telling myself,
isaac, you know you love her.

Freak.

Maybe im wrong. maybe im not.
But i know this...

He might like you more than i do,
But it doesn't mean that i like you any less then he does!

If anyone has any queries, words of encouragement, words of laughter,
cheering up statement, nonsencial nonsense,
and if you're the guy/girl,

feel free to message me, 8112 4447.

Isaac feels so much better after letting everything out.
But Isaac will continue to love you.

This is my story.
& this is the chapter in which you played a part in my life.